26 March 2007
So much more than a sex dream...
"I meet with some friends at an evening conference in London and as it finishes my friend Stephanie (not her real name) asks that we go for a drink. I'm happy with that. To get back to the street, we must walk across a large store. My shoes and the floor are very smooth and I run and slide on my feet, then run again and slide again, making wide turns in between the racks of clothes. I watch them as I pass by and notice a couple of item and think I might come back to try them on. I'm having fun.
Then Stephanie says it was her birthday not that long ago. I'm shocked and hardly believe it when she says that the actual date is 21st Feb, as it is my birthday, too... We've known each other for a while and I had never known! What a coincidence! She says that'll she'll have a proper party at a later date as her girlfriend can't make it that night.
Then we are 4 women. One of us I don't know but somehow we are being introduced much later so that when it does happen, we've had time to know who the other was and she is my cousin's girlfriend. Just before we are introduced to one another, I was masturbating with a vibrator and I take it off and walk to my bedroom and slide it under my pillow. My flatmate Toni is busy hoovering the lounge and then his bedroom (we avoid each other as we get past). As I walk back toward the others, a black woman, petite in size, comes close to me. We hug each other and we walk together holding each other. I caress her back and kiss her head with tenderness. She likes it and responds positively. When we arrive in the room where the others are, she lies down on her front and I kneel next to her and continue caressing her, her lower back, her bum, the back of her legs, while also watching the other women who have only their underwear on. The black woman opens her legs and I bend closer and run my fingers in her pubic hair. I know I will slide my finger up her yoni next and she moans with pleasure. The other women are doing the same to each other. Then the black woman turns around on her back and I would like to lick her fanny."
I wanted to share that dream because it feels like a celebration the the feminine in general and an almost complete acceptance of feminine values. The dream starts in a rational, masculine and Logos setting with a conference - thinking as opposed to feeling! But it moves on quickly to having fun, being child-like in the store. I'm not quite ready to get those new clothes that I like and that would show a different me to the world but I will come back for them. It is only a matter of time now, or at least it seems.
My friend Stephanie's birthday is not on 21st Feb in real life. I believe my dream is telling me that it is time for me to integrate the part(s) of me that resemble her - research scientist and lesbian, that is combining both the masculine and the feminine world...
I will come back to the rest of the dream later today... or more realistically later in the week! I feel I have been given a real gift this morning and it is only the beginning of the week!! Is it not wonderful?
20 March 2007
When neuroscience "meets" psychology but doesn't see it...
What an interesting scientific result I’ve just heard this morning! I didn’t think I would ever be excited about science anymore… The funny thing is that the woman telling her results wasn’t actually completely convinced herself and said she remained very cautious because she’d only studied 10 subjects. But let me tell you more about her study.
She takes 2- and 3-days old babies and while they’re asleep, she makes them listen to either classical music (Bach and Mozart) or spoken words (language). While this is happening, the babies are monitored by a technique called fMRI that allows observing which part of the brain is activated for a given task/action. What she saw in those babies is that a specific part of the right brain hemisphere was activated when the music was on while it was a part of the left brain hemisphere that lit up in the machine when they were talked to.
The woman said that she was very surprised that differentiation between the two brain hemispheres happened so early in life and she wasn’t expecting this. I wondered why she was surprised: language is a sound that is structured, rational and follows well established rules; it would therefore have to activate the left, logos, masculine brain hemisphere. Music on the other hand falls into creativity, diffuse awareness and feelings and would have to be picked up by the right, creative, Eros, feminine brain hemisphere. Still, I realised quickly that I was the only one in the group of people she was talking to for whom her results made complete sense.
I felt rather frustrated that they couldn’t see the bigger picture but I decided to keep my mouth shut, mostly because of the professional body that I represented in this event. This study serves so well psychology… Yet, it is so surprising to scientists that they can’t believe it… Shame!












